When was the last time you did this, even in private? Do you give yourself a pat on the back when you have those big or even little wins, or do you downplay, dismiss, chalk it up to luck, good timing, or happenstance, and move on?
Celebrating your accomplishments doesn’t mean gloating, which is a whole other level of stick-it-in-their-faces, I’m-so-great, kind of narcissistic tendency. I mean, when was the last time you accomplished a goal you set forth and then gave yourself the proper due respect of acknowledging it?
We do it for others all the time (and you’ll notice, it’s usually while they’re downplaying their own win); i.e.
“Your cake looks amazing! Great job!”
“Thanks. I figured by this third attempt it would finally come out right. I mean it was bound to happen eventually after so many failures, right?!”
It doesn’t matter how trivial the situation is, the problem is the voice inside your own head that you’re not only cultivating, but nurturing. The voice of self-negativity.
I set a somewhat lofty goal for myself this last year, which was to host a women’s workshop focusing on positive sense of self, and translating that to lifting up others. I had never done anything like this before. I dreamt it up, I sought out sponsorship, coordinated a location, food, and drinks, designed the program outline, put it out into the world, and set a price for the registration.
You know what? People showed up! They actually came! I’m a one woman show here with no roadmap other than the one in my own mind and People. Showed. Up! Women from all walks of life; those I knew, and those I didn’t showed up to be a part of this vision I had of bringing women together. I was insanely proud of myself.
I had purchased a ‘nice’ bottle of champagne (I mean, not Dom or anything, read, just not Cooks, although I do love Cooks any old day so I’m not getting down on it!), which on a side note I also want to point out that I did actually purchased this ‘nice’ bottle on sale…because I loves me a good bargain, (take that, $60.00 price point, haha) anyway…I digress…that I told myself I would save for one of two events: either when I sell my next book to a publisher, or my dream for this women’s workshop is realized and actually happens.
It was good; I set a goal, and I gave myself an incentive. But, you know what actually happened? We’ve already established the workshop was successful, but I didn’t drink it. Really, that was last year and that bottle of champagne is still sitting in my wine stand right now.
Why? Well, I guess the sad simple truth is that I still didn’t feel that I had earned it. What?! Yeah, I know, cue the eyeroll to myself. Did I still not feel like I was enough even in my accomplishment? I guess that really was the gist of it. When all was said and done it felt like I should do more. Instead of sitting back and being proud of myself for getting that far, I felt like I still had further to go until I could reap the reward.
This is what I want you to know: First of all, you don’t need permission from anyone to do this; just do it. Second, you don’t have to go further before you take the reward. Take it, as it is, and as it comes your way. Take each and every single reward. You know why? Taking the reward won’t stop you for continuing to strive for more. You know what it will do if you don’t take it? It will rob the joy from the accomplishment you’ve already made. That’s not very self-motivating, now is it? Negative self views do not inspire positive self growth. All you’re doing here is reinforcing the negative. You’re focusing on it. You’re nurturing it, and it’s becoming your inner voice.
Don’t do this to yourself. Pat yourself on the back, sit back for one second and take a look at what you’ve built; where you’ve come from; what you’ve accomplished, then move on to take the next step. If you don’t, how will you ever be fully satiated in anything your set out to accomplish?
Just take that moment for yourself; a smile, a wink in the mirror and then
drink the champagne!
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